Oh, man, am I looking into a mirror right now? Sometimes the lord gives you signs and you can feel something is right. First off, I’m a bonafide Rockstar Celeb and second that guy looks just like me! Third, I’m low on work and a Paid Internship would really be a blessing right now.
If you don’t believe I’m a real Rockstar Celeb, well, does the name Scott Stapp ring a bell?! Scott Stapp of CREED?! CREED from the 90s?!
Yeah, I am kind of like if Kurt Cobain and Jesus Christ had a child but one of them was a woman so that it wouldn’t be an abomination in the eyes of God and also so it would be biologically possible.
Creed were the second biggest thing to Jesus with the kids back in 1997-2001. And just like the big man our success brought together two millenniums.
In a lot of ways I’m like Kurt Cobain if he’d never killed himself (may he rest in hell receiving the punishment he deserves) in that I am a huge Rockstar Celeb.
I know what you’re thinking. So you’re Scott Stapp, one of the greatest rock stars to ever grace the stage and you’ve toured God’s Green America and even to Japan once, who cares? Well, first off, you care, my friend. You said you wanted a big Rockstar Celeb for your blog and now you got one so don’t throw your baggage on me. How many Creed CDs you got sitting in your car right now? 2 is what I would guess!
My second qualification (or sign from GOD that I was MEANT to take this internship) is that I LOOK JUST LIKE THE GUY IN YOUR PHOTO! If this was the post office I’d go up and turn myself in like ‘yeah that’s me. lock me up’. I’m sitting here in tighty-whiteys on a moss covered rock watching my abs glisten right now!
It’s like that old poem Footsteps. Sometimes you think you’re all alone walking on the beach outside your mansion but no…that’s just God carrying you with his even bigger muscles to the freedom of a paid internship.
If I don’t get a reply I’m gonna come to the office on Monday oiled and sweaty in my tighty-whiteys so you can see what a mistake you made!!
Forever in Christ and Creed (the band),
(originally posted on RockstarJobs.tumblr.com)