May 2013
1 post
9 tags
ROCK STAR JOBS: Dear woman,I am writing to inquire... →
rockstarjobs:
Dear woman, I am writing to inquire about the Retail Rockstar position in Cosmetics and Make-up. For several decades I mastered the use of cosmetics and make-up in live performances and televised appearances with my rock group, KISS. I became especially good at using make-up to create the…
March 2013
1 post
8 tags
February 2013
4 posts
12 tags
12 tags
Dear Gun Rights Advocate,
Since the shooting at Sandy Hook, most Americans have been re-examining their position on gun control. A lot of you have been standing firmer than ever on the issue. Even though the polls seem to be turning against you, and your points seem to be harder and harder to justify, you keep grasping hard to your position. And it doesn’t look like it’s going away — though it...
J. W. Crump: Joel Applies to be my Part-Time... →
jwcrump:
For my company, I recently posted the need for a part-time receptionist. My friend Joel (@joelstraley), recognizing my email address in the ad, responded thusly. It’s the greatest cover letter ever written.
“Hello,
I am very desparate for a emoyment! This looks xciting for me to have for moneys! This is a job for moneys, rite? Thank yu! I very much expericne doing work such as...
December 2012
3 posts
2 tags
Uncanny Brett White: Crowdsourcing Best Albums of... →
joestanton:
justinericgrace:
joestanton:
uncannybrettwhite:
Whatever energy I devoted to keeping up with music from the years 2000-2007 has been completely transferred over to the comic book portion of my life. I don’t know jack about modern music, and I feel like a ridiculous old man every time I read any websites year-end “best of” lists. None of these…
Frank Ocean, Channel Orange
...
1 tag
3 tags
October 2012
1 post
September 2012
1 post
joelstraley asked: How do I know the difference between sex and love?
July 2012
1 post
9 tags
June 2012
1 post
6 tags
April 2012
1 post
2 tags
Best Improv Scene
williebhines:
Reblog and describe the best improv scene you ever saw.
Death By Roo Roo in Cagematch in 2009. They started doing a scene about a Bed and Breakfast in Middle Earth. Nothing super-weird was popping out during the first five minutes- just a slice of life of an Elvish Bed and Breakfast. THEN Curtis Gwinn, proving why my friend has nicknamed him ‘The Architecht’, steps in...
March 2012
3 posts
30 tags
6 tags
Why I am Joining Goldman Sachs
I have become aware of an opening as the Executive Director within your firm. Allow me to express my interest in this, or any other, position.
If you’re not a liberal by 20 you have no heart, if you’re not a conservative by 24 you must’ve landed a job dispute having a liberal arts degree. Since graduating from college, and after three unpaid internships and two chained-to-a-desk...
4 tags
February 2012
3 posts
15 tags
6 tags
January 2012
1 post
1 tag
December 2011
2 posts
29 tags
2011: Hip-hop Just Fucked your Face!
2011 was a great year for rap. You might have noticed all kinds of new and diverse hip-hop artists popping up this year releasing mixtape after mixtape that turned YouTube views into real money. But you probably didn’t notice that many of these artists weren’t just after your ears- they wanna fuck your whole face. In the past rappers have gotten head, brains, and dome but now...
7 tags
huerca zafada: When I say I'm pro-life... →
speakfortheweak:
It doesn’t mean I’m religious. Because I’m not. It doesn’t mean I hate LGBT community. Because I am a supporter. It doesn’t mean I force women to give birth. Because I never will. Take what you want from my blog, but never assume I’m just your stereotypical pro-lifer. It is VERY possible to ask questions, state your opinions in a civil manner on this blog. I am respectful and I...
November 2011
3 posts
2 tags
9 tags
7 tags
October 2011
4 posts
11 tags
7 tags
30 tags
Occupy Reality: Why the Media Can't Digest the...
By Joel Straley
The media has become obsessed with the question “What does Occupy Wall Street want?” The media is becoming so frustrated trying to find the answer that they’ve begun to glorify the previous voice of protest in America, the Tea Party. They claim the Tea Party was different since it had a focused agenda and a stance on policies being pushed through congress. Just...
30 tags
Jobs, Oil, and Politics, as Usual
My friend Nic Vogele recently shook hands with President Obama as he made his way to Cincinnati to promote his new Jobs bill. He recorded the speech and posted it on his blog: nlvogs.wordpress.com
Below is what Nic originally posted. He made the mistake of asking my opinion. Here is our conversation about the current Jobs crisis and it’s wider implications:
Nic: All I can say is,...
September 2011
1 post
11 tags
Why Vote for Rick Perry When Someone Great is...
When it comes to the GOP’s race towards the White House Texas Governor Rick Perry is hot shit. Unfortunately, so is his home state of Texas which is suffering from uncontained wildfires.
In April, Gov. Perry’s state was seeing historic wildfires which forced him to put his leadership skills to the test. After cutting funding for volunteer firefighters from 27 million to 8 million this...
June 2011
1 post
5 tags
May 2011
2 posts
21 tags
When Godot Doesn't Show
The fringe of the religious eat their own bullshit.
“Soon will be the day when it will come out gold”
But no, they’ll just be full of shit.
Never once considering ”What is it that comes out of assholes?”
When the day comes they are surprised to see their own shit.
They proclaim “No, this is gold, it is still true what we have told”
Claiming it taste...
10 tags
April 2011
2 posts
6 tags
19 tags
March 2011
2 posts
5 tags
“As for the Republicans — how can one regard seriously a frightened, greedy,...”
– H.P. Lovecraft, on republicans (via recursiverecursion)
14 tags
Joel Straley's Sketches: Tom Blythman, Facebook... →
joelstraleysketches:
By Joel Straley
Recently, Tom Blythman* posted on his Facebook wall: “Those fucking japs are just scamming us…. I just checked google streetview and everythings fine.” I’ve decided to investigate the mindset of the type of individual that would post such a status. INT. CLASSROOM - DAY TOM BLYTHMAN is checking his Facebook while his HISTORY TEACHER rambles on. Tom googles...
February 2011
2 posts
10 tags
Rep. Weiner Strikes Again!
This time for Women’s Rights and what it means to be a “conservative”. In a debate over H.R. 3 Rep. Anthony Weiner of New York spoke out against the philosophical conservatives of the GOP standing strongly with a bill that would ban federal funding for abortion as well as impose tax penalties on individuals and small businesses. The GOP has been trying hard to be a force of less government...
8 tags
January 2011
5 posts
4 tags
6 tags
6 tags
6 tags
6 tags
WatchDream Drunk promo video for ”{~,~} (That Witch Shall Not Be Named)” Download “Yksynzorots” LP megaupload.com?d=BZOFGCHR (DreamDrunk.bandcamp.com)
December 2010
3 posts
6 tags
WatchThe end of the relationship (or rape-tionship, that’s a thing, right?) between the GOP and 9/11 has been a long time coming.
I guess I’m glad there is now some substantial hypocrisy to end this outside of Ann Coulter demeaning the 9/11 widows or Glenn Beck talking about how he wished some of the families of 9/11 victims would shut up. Its sad that it is at the cost of the 9/11 first...
12 tags
Taking care of people is not in the interest of...
If there is an unemployment rate of 15%, in theory 85% of a country is employed.
It can be assumed that this is bad for business because 15% of the population cannot afford a high variety of goods and services.
However, the 85% still purchases their goods and services but are charged more for them to maintain profits akin to 100% of the population.
Business only has to maintain an urgency for...
6 tags
November 2010
6 posts
3 tags
12 tags
dontdiewonderingmusic:
Dream Drunk
Dream...